- Tim, it's mom, I'm, I don't wanna upset you, but that's in the emergency room.

They quite, they don't quite know what's wrong with him.

They're doing everything.

He's conscious.

He passed out this morning on the floor or something.

But I, I don't want you to freak out, but you might wanna, you know, you might wanna come.

You can't, Tim, don't freak out.

Okay.

- I was with my dad the day before he fell.

- Could you take a picture of that?

Yeah, yeah.

I - Got you.

At a wrestling tournament filming my brother tj, just like the old days back when my sisters Aaron and Andrew would be screaming from the stands with my mom.

My dad was always there for us and now he's somewhere else.

He taught me how to use a camera and how to be a good person and how to shave and how to be resilient.

He fell in the house.

We grew up in the place that holds all the best memories of our family.

- Is this supposed to say pause?

No.

Yeah.

- Open your eyes.

Good.

Come on, dad.

Open your eyes.

That's a per dude.

Open your eyes on Dad.

Watch tj.

I gotta take a shot.

- Go, go, go.

Listen, - Todd, open your eyes for your kids.

Open your eyes.

The kids wanna see your eyes open - Two months before your fall.

I left my job as a high school teacher to become a filmmaker, but this wasn't the film I wanted to make.

But I do feel so lucky to be here.

Even though it's terrible and hard.

I don't know why, but I'm obsessed with the sadness.

I want to document it.

I have to film it.

I can't be away from it - Alone.

45 miles above the moon's surface.

He completed an orbit every two hours.

He listened to the progress of the moonwalk and awaited the moment when his companions on the surface would lift off to rendezvous with him.

- Two.

Wait, one more mile.

Open those eyes.

- You wanna open your eyes?

- Todd, your eyes, dad.

- Here you go.

Yeah.

Hey Dad.

Hey Todd.

So good to see you.

It's - Gonna be all right.

Dad.

- You're doing great.

You're doing great.

The doctor said you're gonna be fine.

He's falling.

You're doing really good, - Dad.

Everything's gonna come back little by little, - Okay?

Yep.

- Everything's - Slowly gonna come back.

Your sight.

Hey.

Yep.

Your hands.

Everything.

We just gotta relax right now.

Everything's okay?

Everything's all right.

- Have you looked in the mirror since you've been in the hospital?

Are you ready to look in the mirror?

- First thing here is, yeah.

To get that.

Good.

You do it.

You get that right leg out.

Good job.

Okay.

Now real slow.

I'm gonna help you push up.

All right?

Okay.

We just look at your eyes while you're sitting up too.

Okay?

Just to see if they're bouncing at all.

Do you feel dizzy?

- A little bit.

- Okay.

You ready?

Yep.

Okay.

You ready Liz?

Alright, we're gonna go on the count of three.

You ready?

Todd?

1, 2, 3, up, up and over.

- Nice.

You strong.

- You don't give yourself enough credit.

Is what's going on there?

Yes.

Strong.

Not really.

You actually helped a lot with that, Todd.

- Nice.

That's awesome.

Dad.

Little by little man.

- Now which side do I grab?

- Well, you are gonna push off from both arm wraps.

- Yep.

Okay.

- Yep.

And you stand up, both elbows go up there.

Do you remember this from yesterday?

- 1, 2, 3.

- There you go.

Good.

Keep leaning forward.

Straighten out those knees.

Good.

- Got it.

Thank you for going.

- Sure.

Yep.

Grab those.

Grab those pens.

Even the left one.

Go shield.

Nice.

Dad.

You too.

- Every day is a little bit further.

- You stopped yesterday at that point.

Get doubling right now.

You're doing double.

- Yeah.

Made - It yesterday.

I can't - Believe I'm still alive.

- That is your first meal.

- I know.

- 13.

Oh, oh, that's - That.

Looks good.

- You excited about that dad?

Yeah.

- Yeah.

- Thought I was just gonna be Turkey gravy, asparagus.

- That's good.

- Yep.

And Merin orange.

- Well, let's get right into it.

- Oh, okay.

- Let's go right to down.

Let's not mess around.

Go right with in case I die.

- You are not, - We're gonna go with, yeah, we'll go with that.

- Oh boy.

- Oh man.

I, - You good cook?

- I didn't cook.

- No salt.

- No.

- I like the, how's your thinking?

How's your memory?

- Stagnated.

- Tell me more about that.

- Let's see.

Where do you want to go?

- Well, do you feel like you're remembering things that go on every day pretty well.

- Short term is limited.

- Okay.

- Long term is pretty good.

- Okay.

And you already told me why you're here.

Tell me your address.

- Two Jacqueline Street, Hudson, New Hampshire.

- You got it.

Nicely done.

Okay.

Cruising and do some more activities.

Okay.

- All right.

- I'm thirsty.

And I have a little ginger ale over there.

- Are you - Ready?

- Yeah.

Sips Dad.

Just little sips.

Nice.

How was that Todd?

- Fabulous.

Sips.

It was like a, - How can I say this?

- It was like a, A stretch of golf that you always remember and you never forget because you were there.

- Remind me when I, if I ever get younger, never get a haircut.

Like PJ reminds me of an airport abandoned just like a hot top with just spots grass everywhere.

Suppose that that - That's enough.

- Yeah.

- Alright.

- Yeah.

Fair.

- I don't remember the house at all.

I remember the, you know the structure.

I remember apartments.

I remember the old places we used to live, but I don't remember two Jackman Street.

- No at all.

What don't you remember about it?

- I don't remember where it's located.

I don't remember what it looks like.

I don't remember the pool.

I don't remember nothing.

- Well, it's okay.

It's gonna come back, you know, like they said, that's pretty normal.

Like you remember the garage?

Think about the garage.

Not really.

No.

No.

That's okay.

For some reason you can't remember the old house.

Our house we lived in for over 20 years.

We, you raised all four of your kids.

You can't remember dad, when you were in a coma a few months ago.

The bank foreclosed on our home.

That house you can't remember anymore.

It's gone.

- It been so bad.

I went through this way.

- Yeah.

- Hey, it's a happy day though.

We're getting, we're getting outta here bud.

Happy day.

Know - To go.

Hey.

Doing.

It's an - Emotional though.

I know.

I'm sorry.

- I'm sorry you had to go through this.

- Watch that.

Thank - You.

Tell me if you recognize any of this that we're coming into now.

- Yeah.

What, what are we going on?

Do you know?

Off 1 95 to what industrial lab wanna call it?

Yep.

What's, what's industrial lab attached to?

What's this called?

Oh, connector.

There you - Go.

That's right.

It's all coming back.

- You know what I mean?

- Yeah.

With a towel.

I do the dance, I redo it.

We just say - Take a breath.

It's the best medicine.

- Okay.

Which stopping is excellent.

- Thank you.

Very good.

Is there apples in it?

There Apples.

My you the - Not gonna be, do you still have boys deception?

- No, he does Just do a little wise man.

Are you alone?

Some tonight.

Are you?

That's not my home.

- He hates this.

Really love me tender loo.

See that you, - Are you excited?

- You want me to rub your - Yeah, up - A little bit.

Yeah.

Thank you - So - Much.

- Ahead.

Now - One light year is 5.88 trillion miles.

And from one side of the universe to together is 190 billion light years.

They figure in 4 billion years our galaxy will collide with andro and it'll become one galaxy together.

- Stole the movie.

- Shut - That off.

I'm taking - Everybody looking good.

The O'Donnell riding out.

- I had a fat belly back then.

Ice Delaney.

He's upset.

This could be tough.

That's your voice.

- What's it like seeing, seeing that old, that old clip of, you know, the house we used to live in?

- Well it was, it was obviously a good day 'cause everybody was having fun.

But not a lot about me.

Do I remember?

I know it's me 'cause 'cause of the way I look, but I don't really have any emotions or any recollection.

I just know it's me.

But it's, that's it.

- If you lose part of your memory, do you lose part of yourself?

- Wow.

I think so.

I think you at least feel like you lose part of yourself.

I know I would.

- Memory's kinda like your to life.

You build your life off of your memories.

You take away bits and pieces of that.

It's like taking away pieces of that building.

- I'm doing fine.

There's a butt there.

I can tell you're doing fine, - But Well, I know when I sit outside at night that I look out and I'm looking out through me.

But it part of it's not me.

I know that - Months are going by and you're not remembering anything.

You can't seem to remember playing golf A game you've played for over 50 years.

You haven't remembered anything from the old house.

If all those memories are gone, do you remember us?

Do you remember me - Guys?

Where are you?

I can't find you guys.

Where are you?

Where are you?

Are you guys?

- Where are you?

- I can't find you, - Dad.

I'm making a plan.

I think I can get your memories back.

I'm gonna take you back to the places you can't remember.

Eventually everything should come back.

- The beautiful Do nothing.

- Attention, no press.

Smashing.

Please take no soul.

I'm with a cop.

I'm not gonna worry about it.

- What used to be over there?

Back when we, when I was real young.

- Oh yeah.

We used to have a rabbit.

- Yeah.

What was the name?

- Yeah, buckwheat.

I remember - The what would you say?

What would you go out?

- Yeah.

Bucky.

I remember the rabbit.

'cause it was a good rabbit.

- What would you feed the rabbit?

I would feed him - Anything.

I would Carrots.

- You used to feed him like chicken fingers too though, right?

- Yeah.

Feed him everything.

Whose rabbit was that?

Which kid - You remember?

- No.

No.

That's all right.

- Who?

What kid?

- That was Angel's.

Oh, that was the Angel's Rabbit.

Yeah.

Little Angel.

- Oh yeah, this is, - It used used to be a computer over there.

- Yeah.

This used to be our family room.

Yeah.

And then we added on that room.

And this was a computer room and computer there.

We had a couch there.

I remember that.

Yeah.

- It's amazing.

Just think probably like a month, two months ago, you could drive by the house if you even remember it.

Well think about that.

The first couple trips over here, even outside, you just, you could remember it.

You could remember the pool.

You couldn't remember the garden.

Nothing.

And no, - What a difference now.

Well now that I'm in it, but I still don't remember upstairs at all.

Yeah.

Well it's all right.

But goes by little, right?

- I'm gonna go into this room.

- Do you remember this room, Deb?

- I, I don't, I guess it was our bedroom.

And I'm just wondering how I would've fallen.

How could one fall and have such a head bleed like that?

I don't understand.

It's not that hot.

It's not like concrete.

But you know, it's funny.

I don't, I don't have any emotion.

I mean, I thought I would, I thought I couldn't come in this room, but just a room.

To me, - It's just the way it is.

- So tell me about, tell me about this morning.

You trying to remember the house?

- Well, well, you know, I, I haven't been upstairs yet, so - We actually did, we went upstairs.

- We did?

- Yep.

- Oh, well, I don't remember that too much.

It doesn't bother me that I don't remember it, but it's like I'm sitting on the sideline at a big parade and all of the extrasensory things are going by and I just sit there and just stare and understand that something different is happening.

- Do you remember like me and Lulu and Aaron and TJ living in the house?

- I, I don't know.

- I don't want anyone to jump out at - Me.

- So tell me about dad changing, like what, what have you, have you noticed that it's a kind of a different person?

Like since the injury or - Well, what the heck is all this stuff coming from?

Yeah, it's like this ride where everything's being thrown at you right now.

All these little rocks, there's there little bumps in the road that you don't realize.

I was watching a show, it's a half hour comedy, but it is about bereavement.

It's about a bereavement group.

His wife died.

They're young, you know, so she died sad, very sad.

And everyone there has a story, but it's shown in a wicked funny light at the very end that he was talking to another bereavement crazy person.

And then they just kind of went, ah, and he put his head down a little bit and you could feel like, you could feel how much he really missed his wife.

And all of a sudden I bursted out crying.

Like, I don't even know where it came from because I could feel so much on the show.

He missed his wife.

He said, cut up.

I got in the bathroom and I was sobbing.

It was ridiculous.

Like what?

And then I admitted it to myself.

I Ms. Todd.

And I know that's so mean to say.

Like, I am so lucky.

Those, those first couple weeks when we didn't know if he was gonna live.

I was, I couldn't even think about that even without him.

I, I absolutely couldn't even think about it.

So for me to be thinking, gee, I miss the old time I thought was so bad of me, but I, I am missing the old time - At this point.

You know, two times a week for OT and for PT is what we've Yeah.

Kind of gone with.

And then we can kind of see how things are going and - Do you think it will ever get back to, or what can it possibly end up just staying like that.

- I think that's going to continue to improve.

I really do.

I think for, it's, it's a very hard question to answer as far as whether or not you'll ever be back to where you were before.

We don't know.

We don't have, - You can't tell by this point.

- Can't.

No, you just can't tell Then I think for you, you know, you, you, you tend to ask us the same question and I don't know if it's 'cause you don't like the answer or which I don't - Blame you.

It might be also the brain injury injury.

- It could be that, that it's memory piece or if it's because like what we talked about today where you, where you remember what you were like before.

But the frustrating piece, and I can only imagine is that you're not, it's not normal yet.

It's not your normal.

- Right.

But just kind of interestingly, ever since he came back, he can remember a bunch of points in life, you know, from a month before the accident to six months before a year, two years, everything is there.

Can't remember his home.

Yeah.

We were talking and can't remember golf.

I have like my own theory.

Yep.

And, and I don't know.

Well what's your theory, obviously like Yeah, that's the way the mind works and the way your body works.

It's, there's defense mechanism, mechanisms in place.

Whether it's like PTSD where like, you know, you go through a tragic situation but you can get through it because your body, your your function to get through it and you kind of deal with it later.

Yeah.

Or more likely than not, you're never gonna be able to play golf again.

All the problems with the house from this point forward, we, we knew we were losing the house.

Like these are things that he's never gonna gain back.

He's never gonna be able to go back to the house or have the house.

He's been there for 20 plus years.

He's golfed his whole life after this accident.

He's not gonna be able to go back and do all that.

He's not letting himself remember the house.

'cause he can't go back to it.

He can't have it.

And that's tragic.

That's, that's, that's sad.

- TI think you're a hundred percent right.

I have to - Deal with because it's so odd that he can remember other events around that time, right.

Places, roads, everything - I think.

- But the house has just disappeared from his memory.

- I don't think I love be able to play golf again.

- Do you remember golfing at all?

- I, I, I remember down, down south when I went down to Texas to become a professional and when I was a kid playing and all that.

And then, and then when I come back, I don't remember anything right now.

I think, think I will over time.

'cause I didn't remember going down south.

- Yeah.

- But you know that - That's something that came back recently, huh?

- Yeah.

That's something.

- What does it feel like when it comes back?

Do you just all of a sudden remember it or?

- No?

I think I had, I had dreams.

- Oh, - I had dreams of it.

- So your memories come back in the form of dreams.

- Yeah.

Whenever I sleep on my left side, I have dreams and I can only sleep on my right side.

But sometimes I sleep on my left side.

I, I don't know how I do it, but I I I get to sleep and that's when I have dreams, you know?

And then the next day I'll wake up and then it'll come to me as a flash.

And, you know, maybe that's something connecting.

- Do you think my dad can get his memories back?

- You know, I think that those remote memories, that's hard to answer because I, I really don't know if they're gone to be quite honest.

I don't know if we know enough about it to be able to answer that.

You know, the, if the the memories are there, it's probably just a matter of him.

Maybe if, maybe having the right emotional trigger, whether it's going to the golf course and, you know, smelling the, the, the, the freshly cut grass.

Maybe.

Maybe the sight, the golf course.

- Good luck everybody.

Thank you sir.

Thanks.

Okay.

Jackson, you go get him.

- Make it easy change.

- Okay, Al.

Take care.

Good luck, judge.

Good to see.

I can't make it up the hill.

Yeah, I I you're excused.

I normally could run up there, but I can't even make it.

So, - You know, it's unbelievable.

For a few seconds I could see myself in that group walking up the hill with Jack Hassett.

Now I don't know what that indicates.

I know that I played in the tournament, but I don't know if I was any good.

But for a few seconds I could picture myself walking up with Jack Hassett in that group.

So if that's the case, I must have been able to hit it pretty good.

I'm sure it'll start coming back to me.

I had that flashback that I should have been in that group going up the hill - With Jack Hassett.

I don't know where that came from.

- Or it could be that you're here, dad, you're smelling.

Yeah.

You're seeing, you're feeling.

I think so.

I think I'm, I think you're right Timmy.

I think you're starting to remember it.

I think it, it'll just be a matter of time before everything comes back.

- I sure hope so.

It's been a long time - To be, to be trapped inside your own head.

Maybe I'll get back to head that.

- Yeah.

How you been hitting him?

I don't know.

How's my hair?

That's all I hear about.

Looks, looks great.

That's all I hear about.

I I pushed it right a little bit.

Oh yeah, yeah.

He's got he's got about - 65 dads.

Yeah.

He's gotta play the wing on this shot.

Oh, he hit it as hot as he could.

I don't know if he's got enough strength.

He's okay.

That's my son.

Gotta teach him how to get stronger like the old man.

You know, I had the drinking addiction, I had the smoking addiction.

I've had a gym addiction.

I've had an eaten addiction and I've had, and I like to gamble.

So what do you want me to cut out?

Which one I got, I got one in nine and I got nine over the 1 3 7 perfectors and 1 3 7 with nine.

And then I got a tripod wheel 8, 9, 8 9 with 1 3 7.

My lucky numbers are one nine.

My father's were three seven.

Yeah.

And so I put 'em together.

I've played those for about 20 years.

I've hit some pretty good ones over the, over the, the span of time.

I've also, no gambler would ever tell you they won.

They did.

If they did, they're lying.

Come on Mario.

- One time.

Somehow I'm finding the old you here, your old ticks, your smile, your voice is back.

But it's just here.

Your gambling addiction is somehow a way back to you - When you have a compulsion.

Right.

And things are not going well in your life.

It's your only - Control.

- Exactly.

It's not even control if you think about it.

It was awful.

And you know, it's hard because he's such a damn good guy.

That's the hard thing.

But I think as it was explained to me by a psychiatrist recently that the niceness and all that, I think she said something like, he always felt guilty.

And even when he had absolutely no more money to gamble, that was good too.

Because then he learned to gamble with seriously making 10 and 20 cent bets, which really, I like a dollar be.

So you see, no matter what, he had to have a little of that gamble gambling.

Even if it meant spending $10, which I, and I used to tell him, I don't mind.

You don't drink, you don't smoke.

I do all those bad things.

He needed fun.

But what I wasn't getting as was just recently explained to me that his gambling unfortunately is like me saying to him, yes, he has $20 go gamble.

That is light saying to an alcoholic, a reformed alcoholic, you can have a couple sips of beer.

It's if you, if you are a gambler that it is the same thing.

But right now, the way I feel is he's got to have something.

Especially now.

And you've seen it yourself.

He is so focused there.

He has his friends there.

He just has to make the commitment to take $20 and poll it and do anything he wants with it.

Whatever, whatever.

As long as he's not taking it from us.

- Should we, do you wanna like start at the top and run through the notes?

Yeah.

- So was it an emotional meeting?

- Yeah.

Yeah.

Wicked.

So she's saying that he's on a slow decline in terms of intaking of information and absorbing information.

He's making up more things now.

So he's inventing information as he, you know, forgets, you know, and one of the, again, one of the things I heard that I'd never heard was him saying, when will it all come back?

- Right?

- And, - And he knows full well the answer, but will it ever come back?

'cause she, she really bared into him and said, Todd, you have lost your whole other life.

You, you should be a little angry.

I'm happy.

You're happy, but you have to like the word she said, you have to be compassionate with yourself.

Right.

And she said it like three times - Because that's gonna - Help him - Heal.

- Oh.

He was like, when - You keep covering it up, if you think about it, the same with like drinking.

You mask, you mask, you mask, and all of a sudden it comes undone.

And it's scary and it's like real.

If he understands that better, it might help him to understand and like relive, you know, become the new tdy take - Right.

Left to the left.

- Oh, we want, oh my goodness.

Oh my goodness.

Good to see you.

Good to see you.

I forget the - Name.

Sad.

Sad.

Yeah.

How you doing these days?

I'm doing alright.

Sad.

Wow.

That's awesome.

Good to see you.

It's good to see you.

You look so nice.

You very nice to see.

Well, thank you very much for all the help and the care you gave me.

You were very receptive.

You made it all possible.

All you people around me are the reason I was able to do it.

Okay.

And that's, that's why it's easy for me.

It was hard for you with me.

I understand that.

And, and you, you have a lot of patience.

Thank you.

Okay.

You are welcome.

Anytime.

Okay.

- All right.

You wanna sit down?

- Look how much better you doing now.

It's crazy.

- I fine out.

I just gotta leave, that's all.

I'm sorry.

That's okay.

- Speed.

Scene four, take two.

And action.

- Timmy, you keep the cheese pla I don't want - It.

You keep it.

- No, no.

Keep it - Ma.

We have plenty of cheese.

Seriously?

We don't need a cheese platter.

No, you keep the cheese.

- Timmy - Ma, - Take - The cheese.

Okay.

Okay ma, I'll take the cheese.

Thank you ma.

You're welcome.

- It's crazy to film things as they unfold.

- You can't know.

You can't know what will happen.

You can't know.

You can't know what will happen.

We can't know what will happen.

We can't know what will happen.

Happen.

And only guess.

And press and, and press and press record.

- It's important to have these moments.

And remember those moments.

Remember those moments.

Remember, remember them.

- Didn't dad give you that camera?

- Well, maybe I am different and I'm maybe 20 or 30% somebody else.

And so I reflect on myself as such because I, I don't feel so in tune with my past.

Maybe this is my new life and I've got to formulate a new person.

A lot of the old, but you know, some of them knew.

And I truly believe if, if I remembered everything and was emotionally attached and I was the way I was now because of what happened that maybe just maybe I wouldn't want restart my life.

But because of the fact that I don't remember everything and I'm not attached, it's sort of like a new frontier.

And that allows me the energy with life to move forward.

- Now you can't do anything.

I know - It's, we, I'm training.

- We did lose a big part of dad.

A lot of dad left when he fell.

I think it is a lot like a death, or at least we should treat it like that, to maybe all be on the same page with how we're feeling about it.

And then kind of allow ourselves to be angry, be sad and accept it.

Accept what happened.

- We're gonna leave a little early by today.

Okay.

Gail, whatever you say, just because - Whatever, whatever you say Gail, you are looking good there.

Bibi.

You look like a, a regular film guy from the twenties that look like a today guy.

Thanks.

- Yeah.

- I'm so sorry.

I'd be screaming at you right now.

- You to that.

Yeah.

Il I'm not screaming.

I know.

You've gotta - Learn from me.

Ga before his brain injury, we would argue about his gambling.

And I remember he finally, after all these years explained it to me that he goes, I really don't go to win money.

Gale.

You don't understand.

It's a, it's the thrill of the what?

I'll never do that.

- It's the action.

It's the action.

It's the thrill of the moment.

Years ago, I haven't bet with a bookie on football games in 20 years, but the greatest action was five minutes before everything took out was a high, like the zen, at least at the track, you take 50 bucks, you can drive up, you know, you play a few races, you have a good time, you talk to a few people, you have coffee and lunch and you go home.

So it's like entertainment - Basically.

Sure, yeah.

It's a whole social thing.

- It's a social thing.

It's different.

I, I have a clarity of 20 or 30 years ago, I can name everything.

- Yep.

- But, but the last 20 years or 25 years of my life is foggy.

- Well you said you live in a box.

What does that mean?

Again, - I live, I live in a box with the brain injury.

Like I can't go out of that box.

I have to, I have to stay in it.

I have to.

You mean you - Have to has to be predictable.

- Yeah.

Everything - Ritualistic - Correct.

Everything has to be in order.

- It just frightens me a little bit.

But he is so zoned in on space stor.

He watches the same thing almost I think.

I think obsessively.

Yeah.

Space - Programs.

- Yeah.

Like the galaxy, the - Science channel.

- The science channel.

Which this is a new development.

Oh Yes.

Never do this before.

And depth.

And I understand it and I really do feel he's gonna, he's having a breakthrough of remembering because he sometimes will talk about life, you know, after life, if you know what I mean.

Like dying.

But he can't really remember it.

But for the first, he had a dream and he said, I was in the room, I could hear dr. We and all nurses, I could hear all their voices and this loud noise and they said, yes Todd, you can hear us, but you're not gonna feel it.

It's okay.

- And drilling holes in my head.

- And the most interesting part was that his dad was out the door waiting in reality or - In the dream.

He died 22 years ago.

- Neil Armstrong, commander Apollo 11, Edwin Buzz Aldrin, lunar module pilot.

- It's Todd O'Donnell out a Tuesday night Mount Pleasant Golf League.

This is Todd O'Donnell.

His first shot is on.

Oh, Neil does he get it?

And o and it just missed the pin is still rolling.

He is waiting on it and he is waiting upon it and it looks like it won't get it.

So Todd starts off and they're still waiting, still waiting, still waiting for it.

- When did you start getting interested in space?

- When I woke up from this injury.

Hmm.

Just fascinates me.

You'd never be able to reach the end of the universe or the end of, you know, where, where the, where it starts for billions and billions of light years.

I mean it's, it's inconceivable.

- You know?

Why do you think you're like so fascinated by it now versus like before?

- Maybe I'm like a 9-year-old kid.

I'm just fascinated by it because I'm starting my life over again.

Look at the size of those diss.

I wonder who owns those.

Wow.

All done.

- There's a slip.

Indiana Grand.

I'm gonna keep that slip.

Checking on the computer, see if it's a winner.

- Hey, you never know.

You never know.

Nothing venture, nothing gained.

Wow.

So this is where the auction's gonna be, huh?

I guess so.

Wow.

Look at all this, huh?

Crazy.

Yeah.

Ownership will revert.

He gets paid basically by the shot books from the thirties.

Jesus.

- Like what'd you do during the session?

- Walked, - Walked.

You know, - Are you from back?

You not sure?

Not sure it's okay.

But to tell me that, that you don't remember.

Okay.

So if you don't remember what you did in t how can you find out?

Do you remember what the, - So a document of my time here.

- This is your book.

- My book.

- And it's a memory book - Right - Here.

So take a look, open it up.

Okay.

This is something I gave this to you yesterday.

Do you remember that?

No.

Okay.

I gave this to you to use with all your therapies every day.

Okay.

Alright.

- Now.

- No, I just, - You uncomfortable right now.

Yeah.

- That's what I don't understand How something permanent can allow you to see one way and then you all of a sudden have a problem.

No, I like nickling and now it shifts.

So I have to have a reposition.

- So what do we do today?

- Wrap up today Had wrap up.

You, you adjusted my whole life.

In other words, in my mind categories.

- Yep.

So we did some - Category naming.

Category naming plus visual.

- This was the only place that I could find the old you.

This is the place I start to mourn the loss of you.

The dreams have stopped nine years later.

Goodbye, dad.

- I can see glimpses of the past through like a window, but that's about all I'm like stuck in my seat.

Like my mind just turns my body, you know, is, I guess it's awake, but my mind just turns.

And now after this brain injury, you know, she's like my caretaker and my wife.

- Right.

- You know?

Well, - I, I, yes - Too.

- Yeah.

And you know, I think it's, it's, it's hard and, and I don't know if Gail's willing to listen to it, but it's, you know, what happened to us seems as though it sometimes and to a lot of people seems like it's unfair, you know, with the brain injury.

I have to, I have to do what I have to do for me and my kids.

I mean my, I was, my, our youngest one was a freshman in the high school when I was diagnosed.

Wow.

That's traumatic.

And you know, it's the, the damage that has been done to my family is just amazing.

And I, I can only understand that at a very superficial, I understand.

'cause the one thing I do know now is that every day counts.

Yeah.

- You enjoy every day.

Enjoy every day.

- Yeah.

You know, and I'm grateful for every day.

Yeah.

And it's a blessed, every day is a blessing.

And that, that's, you know, that's an important lesson.

- Geez.

It's from another country.

- What?

- No.

- What do - You think they're gonna say today?

Tonight?

I think they're gonna say, wake up that I'm progressing fine.

I think so easy.

Fine.

I mean, you know, there's certain, certain things in my memory that are not coming back and they don't know if they will come back.

All in all, I'm, I've got about 80% back of what I had and the other 20% is like a butterfly.

I don't know if I can catch it.

- It's okay.

- And I don't, I'm, I'm fine.

I got no problems the way I am now.

See people don't realize that I've accepted myself for what ha has happened.

And that's why I can move forward because I've accepted it.

If you do not accept what has happened, how can you move forward?

Because you're always feeling bad for yourself.

I don't feel bad at all.

I feel bad for the people around me.

Like you mother and stuff like that.

But I don't feel bad for - Myself Go football like all day.

- Wow.

Just like the old days.

That was lying.

Missed it, huh?

Yeah.

No, that was just, that was black.

That was hot.

That was like the old days.

Todd kidding.

I needed Mike to line me up.

That's what it was, tj.

Wow.

That was pretty good.

- What might have been lost?

What might been you so good.

Dalia, what did you all do today?